Depression

“How do I cope and heal from the impact of my husband’s addiction when I feel like it both exacerbates my depression and also my depression makes the addiction’s impact feel worse and more stressful? I feel like my side of the situation is like a dog chasing its own tail.”

Your description of how it feels to deal with both your husband’s addiction and your own depression is a good one, and one we hear often. How do you support your addicted loved one’s healing and still get your own needs met? For many women it is important to have a separate support system. This can consist of your own 12 step work: meetings, sponsors, and working through the steps. For many wives, a therapist that understands codependency is a critical piece for them, because they need to feel heard and they need help to get to the source of the depression. Sometimes you are also depleted in the physical components that support happiness and a feeling of peace and contentment such as vitamin D, Vitamin B12 and Amino Acids. Consulting with your doctor about how to support yourself during times when you are depressed can be very powerful. A word of caution: your depression may be partially or largely due to the issues you are facing with your husband, but they may also be genetically or physically triggered. It is important that your relationship not carry the full burden of your depression if that is not really whats happening. You want to look at your physical, emotional, social and spiritual health and make some good informed decisions about how to help yourself. Living with depression is very hard and very isolating and should be carefully treated so that you and your husband can move forward with hope for the future.